Though football has been sporadic this week, with the end of the domestic season in England coming last Sunday, the quality on show has been absolutely tremendous. We've seen Mike Dean doing his best impression of David Brent on the terraces at Forest Green Rovers, celebrating his beloved Tranmere Rovers making it through to next weekend's League Two play-off final at Wembley. He's a character, our Mike, bet he's a fucking great laugh at a wedding after a bottle of plonk. Tuesday saw Aston Villa prevail in the West Midlands, as Dean Smith's men dumped rivals West Brom out of the play-offs in the cruelest of ways - penalties.
Wednesday arrived and we're only just getting out of first gear, it's Leeds' time to bottle it.. again. An enthralling game at Elland Road resulted in Frank Lampard gaining the last laugh in West Yorkshire, crying his eyes out, but with tears of happiness as the Rams bulldozed their way to a Wembley final thanks to goals from Jack Marriott (2), Mason Mount and Harry Wilson. Leeds helped, of course, yet again crumbling under pressure to remain outside the first tier of English football for a sixteenth consecutive season.
Thursday came and we were treated to a freak show at Fratton Park, where although the game was as shit as it could have possibly been, at least the circus were in town to watch from the stands. We thought the Elephant man died years ago; it would appear not, he is in fact a Portsmouth fan who enjoys kicking innocent Sunderland footballers as they accidentally topple over the advertising boards placed directly in front of what is presumably a specially adapted seat. We also had no idea Mick Hucknall was a fan of the south coast club, but I guess every day's a school day. They won't be in the Championship next season anyway, as Sunderland cruised through to the final after a goalless stalemate at Fratton Park saw them win the tie 1-0 on aggregate.